Ramadana-Ding-Dong Or, Bringing Joy to Allah

by EDWARD CLINE June 7, 2017

Bringing joy to Allah is to cause him to perform a Hitlerian jig in ecstasy, when over a dozen British girls are reduced, as Bruce Bawer described it, “to random splatters of blood and to charred, unidentifiable bits and pieces of flesh and bone” in Manchester, England. Bringing death to the children of infidels is an especial “high” for Allah. In the background one may also espy “Mad Dog” Mohammad doing a shimmy and a Moon Walk, as well.

The Muslim who has brought joy to Allah has “gone mental.” Homicidal insanity, after all, is just another way of looking at life – and death. Don’t be so judgmental!

I have never accepted the insanity plea as a legitimate means to escape justice. If a defendant could cook his own meals and drive a car, brush his teeth, and perform other normal, everyday actions without killing himself, then he was sane enough to commit the crime, to engage in premeditation, thinking, plotting, and acting. “Insane” or “unstable” individuals who commit crimes ALWAYS know what they’re doing. No one is ever going to convince me otherwise. Such a person lives in a compartmentalized universe composed 90% obsessing fantasy (Islam’s “ideal” world, belief in an all-knowing, all-powerful deity, and an afterlife in a so-called Paradise) and 10% reality, when he walks and talks and can open and close doors and doesn’t blow himself up while assembling the components of a suicide bomb.

Finally, Islam can only go “mental” because it creates a causo-connective loop, which begins in the Koran with Mohammad and Allah and ends in the Koran with Mohammad and Allah. Muslims must hula-hoop on that loop and act on their “faith” to prove themselves unswervingly devout, and prove it especially to those who would otherwise punish them. Sooner or later even their humble brood mares or baby ovens must take up the knife or the steering wheel and kill unbelievers, as they have done in Israel and now in London. Islam is a homicidal rut from which there is no escape. You either buy it completely or you leave big chunks of it behind in the Fantasy House and try to live in the real world.

While many fellow “Islamophobes” have taken the absolutely right position on Islam, I do not believe with them in “hate crime.” Muslims are notorious for hating everything not Islamic and are more or less free to spout “hate speech” without consequence. Muslims regularly commit “hate crimes.” If a Muslim commits murder, or rape, or robbery, he should be arraigned, convicted, and sentenced for his crime, not for what was going through his mind when he committed the crime. You can deduce why the person committed the crime, and form an estimate of his character and overall world view or philosophy, and that deduction may be used as indicative of a person’s motive. But the person’s thoughts should not be treated with the same moral or legal gravity as the actual crime. And even if you had some sort of magic X-Ray machine that could see inside a person’s mind, that, too, would be irrelevant. Such a deduction should be based on the character of the crime. “Hate crime” is an idea that can easily lead to Orwellian “thoughtcrime.

Making a practice of condemning a hateful and despicable criminal’s thoughts can redound on the wholly correct and rational person’s freedom in a legal sense. That is why condoning “hate speech” is dangerous. “Hate speech,” is a wholly invalid concept, as invalid as is “hate crime.” Because speech is an actual action, its character is irrelevant as an action taken by a speaker or writer against a person, idea, or organization, regardless of its content. It’s the action in reality that is provable and demonstrable, not the contents of a person’s mind. Throwing mental darts or daggers at something does not fall in the realm of cause-and-effect. By mental darts or daggers, I mean, for example, throwing "dirty looks" at Muslims. Everyone should throw dirty looks at Muslims or make faces at them or stick out one’s tongue. Such an action does not result in lightning bolts that can scorch anyone or cartoonish sucker-punches that can double a Muslim over in agony. “Hate speech” so easily leads to censorship.

However, on to the primary subject of this column. Bruce Bawer had some interesting observations on the Ramadan slaughter on London Bridge in his June 3rd column on FrontPage, “Ramadan London: The holy month returns with its sacred traditions.”


Yet again it has returned, the sublime and hallowed month of Ramadan – a beautiful and particularly sacred period that was an original part of the magnificent revelation handed down by Allah to the Prophet himself (peace be upon him) in the Holy Quran. Indeed, it has been widely postulated by many of our holiest of men that the precious text of that sacred volume was revealed to the Prophet himself (even more peace be upon him) during the very first Ramadan.


That is, it was “revealed” to Mohammad when he was starving in a cave above Mecca, and then an angel visited him during his hallucinations, and performed a kind of Vulcan “mind meld” on him and stuffed his little brain with the Koran. This was the first Ramadana-Ding-Dong. He is alleged to have shouted to witnesses down the mountain, “Iftar! Iftar! Rah, rah, rah! Sizz, Boom, Bah!” while doing a wholly inappropriate and suggestive swivel-hipped movement and snacking on a sausage link.

Now that story, as satirical as it is, is about as credible and believable as the entire “religion” of Islam and, indeed, of Mohammad’s existence. Big Mo and the Koran, it seems, appear to have been the creation of a multi-generation of Islamic scribes and “scholars” over 1,400 years. He has the historic existence of Fred Flintstone or the Frankenstein creature.

Bawer emphasizes that Ramadan obliges Muslims to fast and pray a lot from sun-up to sun-down, and to ignore those hunger pangs, but does not demand that they fast from business as usual, that is, raising holy hell at home and outside of it:

….by strictly avoiding the intake of food and beverages, the use of tobacco, and any kind of carnal activity, although the standard acts of incestuous intercourse with minors and, naturally, the brutal sexual violation of the wives and offspring of infidels can be safely pursued per usual. Furthermore, it is to be hoped that the faithful will manifest the great extent of their self-restraint during this period by scheduling such activities as female genital mutilation, wife-beating, and the theologically obligatory honor killing of wives, sisters, and daughters for the hours following sundown…..

Bawer adds:

It is particularly vital that the people of God make a special effort during the holy month of Ramadan not to engage in any act of unkindness, injustice, or insensitivity directed at their fellow believers – although, of course, the tossing of homosexuals from the roofs of buildings, the remorseless stoning to death of rape victims, and the violent execution of apostates may proceed as usual, preferably during the hours of darkness.

To be a really, really devout Muslim requires that one become a Muslim activist, and exert effort to be proactive in expressing the faith in exemplary demonstrations of piety and in forceful and dramatic examples of da’wah:

All of this contemplative and devout activity, to be sure, should not be permitted to distract the children of Allah from such equally urgent and virtuous tasks as mowing down infidels with cars, trucks, and other vehicles, shooting deadly rockets into the heart of urban areas where civilian non-believers are wont to gather, and committing sundry acts of mass annihilation and bloodshed involving such handy implements as machetes and Kalashnikovs.


Bawer does not mention it, but the Muslim aspiring to Allah-blessed purity should familiarize himself with the local hardware store in which to secure (but not necessarily purchase, shoplifting from infidels is a perfect Muslim virtue) boxes of screws, bolts, nails, and ball-bearings to assemble into bombs to explode in the midst of the children of kaffirs and infidels and sports enthusiasts


Most important of all, the consummate lessons of self-control that the people of the Holy Quran are expected to take to heart during Ramadan should not be misconstrued in such a way as to prevent them from setting off bombs at major sporting events, high-profile musical performances, and other large public events at which there is a good chance of reducing large numbers of infidels, especially the small and helpless children of the infidels, to random splatters of blood and to charred, unidentifiable bits and pieces of flesh and bone. On the contrary, the followers of Allah and disciples of the Prophet (peace, yet again, be upon him) should never lose sight of the fact that it is during Ramadan, above all times, that acts of righteous slaughter and virtuous extirpation – those blessed sanguinary proofs of Islamic piety and allegiance – bring even more joy to Allah in His Heaven than they do during the remainder of the year.

Bringing joy to Allah is worth multitudinous Holy Brownie Points and certain to reward an enterprising and energetic Muslim with a zillion renewable virgins, his own grape vine farm, an exclusive Raisinet concession in infidel movie houses, and the privilege of cleaning the dirt from between Allah’s toes (blessing and peace be between his digits).

The enquiring Muslim, however, might, in due time, ask: If Allah is so powerful, why doesn’t he wage Jihad himself? Why does he leave it to fallible and often thick-brained humans to do his work? He could wipe out all the Jews and infidels in one fell swoop with a wave of his holy hand, and then there would be genuine peace and his children could live without having to risk their lives performing unique da’wah.

However, no Muslim would be so curious. That’s what I mean when I say that Islam creates a causo-connective loop that would prohibit a Muslim from reaching that level of thought. It’s a comfortable loop few Muslims would ever want to abandon. Unlike the theology and practice of other systems, Islam thoroughly sabotages one’s cognitive powers and the faculty of thought.

That is why Islam is evil. To borrow a famous adverting slogan: You can check into the Islamic Motel, but you won’t check out. Not unless you accept reality and face it, as many apostates have done, at the risk of their lives from the “Religion of Peace.”

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Edward Cline is the author of the Sparrowhawk novels set in England and Virginia in the pre-Revolutionary period, of several detective and suspense novels, and three collections of his commentaries and columns, all available on Amazon Books. His essays, book reviews, and other articles have appeared in The Wall Street Journal, the Journal of Information Ethics and other publications. He is a frequent contributor to Rule of Reason, Family Security Matters, Capitalism Magazine and other Web publications.     


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